A Handful - Plus One

Dear Benjamin,

Today you are six. SIX! That's a whole lot of fingers, as you have so graciously pointed out to me. It's a few more than I'm ready for you to be, but since I haven't figured out a way to stop time, I'm just going to have to roll with it.

This past year has been one heck of a wild ride with you! You have discovered So! Many! New! Things! and have kept us on our toes trying to keep up with you. You can read now, and can add numbers on the fly. Your vocabulary has expanded, if that's at all possible. You have become less selfish and more aware of others and their needs/wants. You can be reasoned with (sometimes) and you say "Please" and "Thank You" without me prompting you (most of the time). You got the Golden Apple award again this year, for Extraordinary Conduct  at School, and we're still in awe that YOU are the one with the good conduct. We were sure that Pre-K was just "taking it easy on you" and that your Kindergarten teachers would be less tolerant of your outbursts. BUT! They promise us that you were a joy to teach, and that you were a good listener and participant. We see this at home, too - but you are our talker, our do-er, our non-stop-energy-entertain-me-all-the-time kid. You throw temper tantrums and cry at the drop of a hat. You annoy Anthony on purpose now, not just by simply "being". And you do it so masterfully that it's hard to discipline you for it.

And at the same time, you are our lover, our sweetheart, our sensitive child. You want cuddles and hugs a million times a day. You want to be rightthereontopofme when we are sitting on the sofa together. At a restaurant, you want to be IN my lap before and after our meal is served. You can't stand to see anyone be sad; you will rush to draw them a picture, or give them a hug, or comfort them in some way.

Your passions this year: Anthony, trains (duh), trucks (duh), Sebastian the Cat, karate, swimming in the pool and showing off what an amazing swimmer you've become, Legos (duh), Play-Doh, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Santa Claus...and so much more.

As annoyed as Anthony gets with you sometimes, he loves you so much. You idolize him, and I think he's not a bad person to emulate. But he is very lucky to have you for a brother, too. You help him to play make-believe, you bring out his imagination, you look up to him so that he WANTS to be a better person because of you.

And every day that I get to be your Mama is the best day on Earth.

I love you more than life itself, doodlebug.

Love,
Mama

Double Digits

Dear Anthony,

Today you turn TEN! This past year has been pretty exciting. Watching you change into the young man you're surely becoming has been fascinating for me.

You are obsessed with anything to do with science, and want to be a Chemist when you grow up. You bring home books from the library on the different elements, have parts of the periodic table memorized, and are constantly looking for experiments you can do. You email your Parrain (who is a Chemist) to ask him questions. We are also constantly Googling things to find the answer. Last night's Google search: what makes up steel?

This year, in fourth grade, you've joined the school band. You're playing the clarinet, and the progress you've made in four short months has been huge! You've played in one pep rally, and have a Christmas concert coming up. I love sharing music with you, and am so proud of the progress you've made.

Swimming is still a big part of your life, too. You push yourself to be the best you can be, and ask your coaches what you can do on your "off" days to improve your stamina and strength. I love seeing your dedication to this. I was never so dedicated to anything at your age!


This has been a big year for you in Cub Scouts, too. You've moved into the last group of Cub Scouts, and will spend one more year in the Webelos before you move on to Boy Scouts. You love when we go camping, and when you get to just be OUTSIDE.

You got to go on your first hunting trip this year, too. And while you didn't get the deer, I know you had a blast. You came home dirty, stinky, and full of all kinds of fun things to tell me. You even bought yourself a BB gun after the trip so you can practice your shooting for NEXT TIME!

You are a great role model for Benjamin. You come home, start your homework, and then go off to play. Most of the time, you let him tag along! You let him choose the shows you'll watch on TV, even when it's something like "Doc McStuffins"...something I know you think is "baby". You make sure he gets off the bus every day, and run to him to hug him in the mornings when he wakes up. Of course y'all fight - you're brothers! But mostly you just accept Benjamin and want him with you.

I thank God every day that he chose me to be your mom. I'm so lucky!

I hope TEN is everything you've dreamed it would be.

Love,
Mama

A Whole Handful

Dear Benjamin,

Today you are FIVE.  As you put it, you are a "whole hand full"...and we all wholeheartedly agree.  You are, without a doubt, a handful.  And yet, I think we would not have it any other way.

Being FOUR has been a wild ride for you.  Pre-K was awesome - you learned so much, and have come so far from where you were a year ago.  Somehow, you managed to have perfect conduct at school all year long, when at home you are constantly in trouble for mouthing off. Soccer, basketball, t-ball, swimming - you tried it all this year and proclaimed that sport to be your most favorite EVER. You made some new best friends this year, and I was so proud to see you defend them with the fierceness of a mama lion.

Your personality is so colorful, and so beautiful.  You won't be taken for granted, you won't be bullied, you won't be left behind.  You will be my little leader, unafraid of what's in your way.  

I can count on you for hugs, snuggles, and kisses - a million times a day.  You love to draw pictures for us, and insist that they all go on the fridge, or to work, or on my nightstand. 

You have about 6 Post-it-Notes taped to the wall right outside of your bedroom. One is to warn Alexis the Cat that she ought not come in your room. Another is to warn robbers and bad guys that they will face a painful death if they try to steal your toys (or you, for that matter). Another is to welcome your friends and brother (sometimes, but not all the time). I'm not sure what the other three are for. Those descriptions change daily.

You still love trains, planes, helicopters, fire trucks, police cars, ambulances, construction sites - anything and everything that has to do with THINGS THAT GO. When directed to make up a story for you at bedtime, I spin an elaborate tale that involves Thomas the Train, a daring rescue performed by you, possibly a trip to the North Pole to visit Santa, and a crane. Then I get a hug and kiss and you say, "That's the BEST STORY EVER, Mama!"

You make the funniest faces, and say the funniest things. And you repeat things like a little parrot. Where I rarely had to worry about Anthony repeating things I said, I constantly have to worry about that with you. Sarcasm is not lost on you, and you employ your own brand of it with stunning accuracy. It's hilarious to watch someone caught in your crossfire.

Leo is still your beloved stuffed animal. Rarely will you go anywhere without him. And if you do have to leave him behind, you make sure he is surrounded by other friends and you reassure him that you WILL come back for him. The few times he's been left somewhere (like Maw Maw's), we automatically turn around for him. There will be no "going to bed without Leo" for you. You simply won't go to bed. 

You probably don't realize it now, but you've got the best big brother on earth. He lets you (mostly) play with his Legos, he saves a special treat to share with you, he lets you hang out and watch him play a game, he puts aside what he's doing to play with you, he teaches you and loves you. Anthony is so proud to be your big brother, and to lead you (sometimes astray). I hope that the bond between the two of you only grows stronger as you both get older.

Four has been a blast - literally. I'm a bit singed around the edges from this past year. But I wouldn't curb your personality for anything. I can't wait to watch you continue to spread your wings and soar. Just make sure to always come back for snuggles, hugs, and kisses OK?

Love,

Mama

Nein...Anthony is NINE? NEIN.

Dear Anthony, Today you are NINE. This seems to be a big deal to you: it's the last year you'll be single digits. It's a big deal to me, too. But every birthday we celebrate with you is a big deal to me.

This past year has been pretty awesome for you! You've continued to swim on a local swim team and have loved it. You got to go to San Diego, CA for a couple of weeks to Legoland, Disney Land, Sea World, the San Diego zoo, and a lot of other fun places, too. You started Third Grade and are loving your Science class more than anything else; you were so excited that Science became a full-time subject in Third Grade. You say you want to be a Chemist like Parrain when you grow up, and try to absorb anything "science-y" that you can.

You still love Legos. This year it's become Lego Ninjago that holds your fascination. You talk of Lord Garmadon, Lloyd, Kai, Jay, and all of the other Ninjas as if they're real. You sit down with Daddy and Benjamin on Wednesday nights to watch the Ninjago TV show and dissect every little nuance of the show afterwards. You still play with all of the other Legos you've got; Star Wars, City, trains (with Benjamin when he begs you to). There are very few other toys that you want to play with if the other choice is LEGOS.

You made your First Communion in April, and were SO excited to finally be able to take communion with us at Mass. You asked all kinds of important questions about making your First Communion, but the one you were most concerned about was whether you had to drink the wine or not. You were hesitant to do it, but took a tiny sip of it during the Ceremony and decided you wouldn't like to do THAT again!

Shortly after First Communion, you asked to have your hair cut "really, really short". So I broke out Daddy's electric hair trimmer and buzzed you. At first, it took a little getting used to. But after a few days we all agreed that it looks REALLY good on you. You're letting your hair grow out "for the winter, Mama" and it looks strange to me - seeing you with longer hair might take some getting used to. And then, I'm sure you'll want it buzzed again!

You got braces this summer, too. You were so excited about getting them and rarely complain of pain associated with them. I'm so glad, because I remember that mine were painful; especially after a visit to the orthodontist. You've done a really good job of keeping them clean and in good condition. And we've already noticed a huge improvement in your teeth placement and speech.

You make us laugh every day. You are so smart, sweet, and loving. You hate when Benjamin cries, and always want to be first into his room in the morning for hugs. You love to help cook in the kitchen, camping out with Daddy, playing with your friends, building elaborate Lego creations with Benjamin, and reading with me. You don't like being told "no" without an explanation to go with it, missing school, or sleeping late.

Watching you grow and change is one of the best parts of my life. Each day it seems like you're less a boy and more the man I know you will one day be. Keep making me laugh, Anthony...you're what makes my days bright. Love, Mama

Anthony is EIGHT

Doesn't eight sound so...big? How can it be that he is eight? I know I say this every year - but it's true. He is growing up so fast, and there's nothing I can do to stop it!

So, here goes.

Dear Anthony,

Eight years ago you changed my world. You've changed it every day since then, too.



You are a rational and dependable child. You don't like to break the rules too often, and when you do you really feel bad about it. If you think a rule isn't fair, you talk to me about it and discuss it. It amazes me to see how analytical you already are.



And yet, you are still a young boy. A young boy who likes to stand on the toilet seat at school to make his friends laugh, and then is confused when he gets in trouble for it. All you wanted to do was see your friends laugh, you weren't hurting anyone. It's funny to me, how smart you can be most of the time, but then sometimes can't see the rationale behind something.



You loves:
1. Star Wars. Good, Lord, George Lucas has nothing on you when it comes to Star Wars. I imagine he could learn a thing or two from you! You love the movies, TV show, books, toys, Legos...you have sheets, t-shirts, a costume. It's almost as strong as your obsession with dinosaurs was (almost...).



2. Legos. And it doesn't just have to be Star Wars. You LOVE Legos. You love to follow the instruction manual to put together a kit. But you also use any miscellaneous pieces to just build something.



3. Benjamin. You love to show him things, tell him things, teach him things. It doesn't matter to you that at three he probably won't absorb the math...you want to teach it to him. You're the one who helps him with his alphabet, or who shows him how his toys work. You constantly are thinking about him. You gave him the small toy lion you got after completing swim practice last week just because you know he loves lions. I could tell you wanted that toy, but you knew he would get so much enjoyment out of it. And he has. He has slept with it, played with it, and introduced it to his other lions.



4. School. You love to go to school. Your friends are there, you love your teacher, and you love coming home to share whatever new things you've learned at school. You are in the advanced math and reading groups, and are excelling at it all. You absorb things like a sponge, so it doesn't surprise me.



5. Mama and Daddy. You still love to give hugs and tell us you love us. You love that Daddy is your Cub Scout leader for Boy Scouts. You have a great time with him, and are so proud that he is the leader. You still love to snuggle with me, and will bring me a book (Harry Potter, right now!) for me to read to you. I get random hugs throughout the day, and I love it.



You are an amazingly sweet boy, Anthony. I can't wait to see how you take all of these wonderful pieces of who you are now, and turn them into the man I can see you becoming.



Happy Birthday!



Love, Mama

THREE

Dear Benjamin,

Yesterday you turned three years old, and I still haven't figured out how that is possible. Weren't you a baby just three DAYS ago? Weren't you that roly poly little baby the doctor put in my arms just a minute ago?


And now you're sleeping in a big boy bed, sitting in a dining chair at the table, carrying your breakfast plate to the table in the den, riding a bike and swimming in the pool. It's insane how quickly you are growing up.

But, um...this potty thing? Yeah. I'm going to need you to figure that one out soon. I know you know what to do. You just see no reason to do it. Why should you, when you have a battalion of people at your beck and call, ready to change your diaper the minute it needs to be done?

This year has been an amazing one. And a tough one. As you have discovered more words and started stringing paragraphs together, you have also gotten more vocal. And by that I mean loud. Screeching if you don't get your way, screaming if someone dares touch the juice in the fridge before you, yelling when you think you've been slighted in any small way. But it's also been wonderful - you slip your little hand into mine, even for the walk from the bedroom to the kitchen. You smile every night as you drift off to sleep saying, "I love you, Mama." You play (mostly) well with Anthony, copying his every move. You run to the back door to see if Daddy's home from work yet, and when he finally comes you smile and jump up and down.

You love: your stuffed lion Leo, Thomas the Train, Mickey Mouse, singing, bubbles, swimming, balls, eating, napping, snuggling, riding your bike, and birthdays.

I will never forget: "I want you, Mama" when you want to be picked up, you singing to Anthony at bedtime, sticky kisses after you've eaten a lollipop, the sweet baby smell you still have when you first wake up, the way you say certain words (framera for camera, Fri Fri for Kri Kri, mel-lade for lemonade, and so many others).



You are awesome, and I'll never let you forget it.



Love, Mama

Thirty-Three

Anthony asked me on his seventh birthday, "Mama, does each birthday get better than the last?"

Today, I can officially say, "Yes. Yes, it does."

Is that not the BEST birthday card EVER?

SEVEN

Dear Anthony,

Today you turn seven-years old, and I haven't quite figured out how that has happened. When did you turn six? Or five, for that matter? I'm sure we've skipped a few years in between 2003 and 2010.

It just seems impossible to me that seven years ago my life changed. And now we have YOU. This amazingly smart, energetic boy who I can't imagine my life without.





Seven years ago, I never would have been able to guess what was going to come next. I never could have imagined what you were going to have to face as a baby. I never thought that you would be sick. I was healthy, Daddy was healthy - YOU would be healthy by default!






Well, default eventually happened, didn't it? Who would look at you now and think that you had ever been so sick? Who would look at you now and guess that there's a scar on your stomach that tells such an amazing story of your first few months of life?





This past year has been full of so many changes in your life. You moved on to first grade and have blown me away with how smart you are. You love school, you love learning, and you love science most of all (You finally have some of ME in you!).





You aren't afraid of new things, although you DID tell me that perhaps you'll like salad starting when you're EIGHT because SEVEN still seems like salad isn't such a good idea.





I hope you won't kill me later for mentioning this, but I love that you still want to go to sleep every night covered in your (Dad's old) baby blanket with your stuffed monkey, George, hugged in your arms. You are slowly pulling away from some of that stuff; George doesn't go EVERYWHERE with you like he did last year. But you still like to have him at bed time, and I love it.





I think Benjamin is so lucky to have you as his big brother. You have been amazingly patient with his hitting, pushing, biting and general terrorizing. You get that he's younger and is still learning what's right and wrong. It amazes me how you just let him roll all over you and think it's funny. And when Ben wakes up in the morning, you want to be first into his room. When he cries, you're right there trying to help calm him down.







I'm really enjoying watching your relationship with Daddy grow, too. You started Tiger Cubs (Boy Scouts) this year and the two of you have gotten to do all kinds of cool things without me and Benjamin. I'm glad for the time you spend with just Daddy because he is an amazing father and you will learn so much from him.





I'm also really glad that you still think I'm pretty cool. If I make silly faces in front of your friends, you still think I'm funny and laugh at me. I'm still allowed to sing you to sleep every night, and we still get to snuggle and cuddle on the sofa while watching TV. I'm already dreading the day when I won't be so smart, so funny, so cool. I hope it never comes.





When we measured your height the other night, you were so excited to see that you've grown 3/4" since June. You are now 49 1/4" tall (that's 4', 1-1/4") and I can see that you're going to outstrip us all in the height department. You are so long and lean; watching you walk is sometimes funny because your legs are so skinny, and your feet seem so big...you trip just walking (again, you're just like ME in some ways!).





You aren't into sports so much. You're more content to read a book or play your DSi than you are to run around. But if we turn you loose outside, you'll run and chase Benjamin, play on the swing set, swim in the pool...we just have to remind you that you NEED to be outside burning off some energy. Guitar lessons have become what you want most, and the two lessons you've had already leave you talking about the guitar for days.





You are such an interesting and fun kid to know, Anthony. Getting to be your Mama is one of the best parts of my life. I have loved seeing more of your personality emerge this past year. I can't wait to watch you grow into a young man...just don't do it too fast, OK?



Love, Mama